Feeling like a woman

It is no secret that I am the lone woman in a house full of boys! I love my hubby and my three little guys. They have made me happier than I could have dreamed of being. They have also stripped me of some of my femininity. And just for the record, I am not talking about the pregnancy pounds that form an everlasting inter-tube around around my waist. I am talking about replacing dolls with trucks and screwdrivers, pink and purple for blue and camouflage or tea parties for wrestle matches. Before Silas was born there was not a single article of clothing in pink or purple in my closet. Mostly I lived in some variation of black, brown and blue. It had nothing to do with my complexion just comfort level. After Silas, I realized the only way pink would enter my house was on my body. With such a revelation, I decided that it was time to venture into the world of pink. Pink – it says I am a woman, I am comfortable that I am a woman – and shows spit up so much more! Still, it felt like a small step in reclaiming my womanhood. Living with boys means most days are spent in torn jeans, t-shirt and my hair pulled up in a ponytail. It isn’t because I am too lazy to ‘get pretty’ it is that my days don’t require it. If I am going to be outside in my backyard, why put on a cute top…wait, then I would have to have said cute top…which I don’t…which means I need to go shopping…with three little guys in tow…I think I will stay in my t-shirt and torn jeans. Over the last couple months I have made a conscious effort to feel like a woman again. There are a few reasons. The first is truly about finding a new comfort level in my own skin. I am a mom of three whose body shows the wear of three pregnancies and one c-section. It is easy to allow my mind to envy the models I see on magazine covers. Instead, I am ready to embrace who God made me to be as I am now (even if I am still going to try to lose those last 10 pounds). The other reason is I don’t want my children to feel as though they have two mommies. You know, the pretty one who gets all dressed up to go and cares what everyone else thinks but won’t do the same when it is just the family. And while I intend to still live in jeans and t-shirt some days, I want to them to know that I do care about me and how that will reflect on them. Finally, I realize that the best example that they can have about being a wife and a mom is me. I want them to see that I am not perfect, nor am I always ‘put together’ but I try and I want them to see their dad encourage me. I want them to know it is OK for a woman to be ‘one of the guys’ sometimes but it is also good for her to want a day at the spa or a pedicure (which I haven’t had either but I hear they are wonderful). In honor of the feeling like a woman I went to have my hair cut. Forget the trim, I look off 9 – 12 inches! I have one of those short dos and I love it! It is taking some time to style but it is worth it. I also went out shopping this last weekend. I got three new shirts that actually fit (and don’t cling to my stomach as though they were made to fit a toothpick). I also bought a new pair of dark wash jeans. I am starting to look like a woman…I feel like a woman…and man it feels great!

Editor’s note: My friend Jenn asked where the picture was with my new cut. It took a few tries as I am not a self photo taker but here it is. Enjoy!